Life changes every year especially as you get older. Experience is often said to be the best teacher. I look forward to continuing this tradition every year on my birthday. Check back next year for another edition of valuable lessons.
Enjoy the list of some of my favorite valuable lessons this year.
1. Be Your Own Best Friend
Life constantly changes as do the people in your life. Relationships begin, shift and end unexpectedly. However, the one person that you will always have is yourself. You have to be content with being on your own from time to time.
Too many people rely on others for nonstop support and/or entertainment. Solitude is something that successful people all over the world seem to master. Being your own best friend is an essential key to living a fulfilling and worthwhile life.
2. Your Habits Are a Reflection of You
What you do on a daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly routine makes you who you are. If you spend all night watching tv and eating snacks, you can’t be surprised when your fitness goals aren’t achieved. On the other hand, if you go to the gym regularly and eat healthy, it shouldn’t be a surprise that you are in better condition than you were last year.
Habits are a reflection of a person. They show others who you are as a human. Someone who talks all day with nothing to show for isn’t usually seen as a trustworthy person. Working on yourself shows that you are dedicated to improvement. Habits form people; who they are now and who they will become are directly correlated to their regular habits.
3. Stay True to Yourself
So many things in life will try to knock you down or change you for the worse. The world around us may be confusing or frustrating at times, but this shouldn’t change who we are.
Changing for yourself is one thing. However, you should never change for someone/something else because of external factors. Humans are meant to change but shouldn’t be forced to change. Be who you are and stay true to yourself.
4. Solitude is Necessary (Even for Extroverts)
Everyone needs solitude from time to time. The world is moving so fast and doesn’t slow down for anyone. That doesn’t mean we can’t slow down our own worlds. Solitude is necessary to stay sane especially when life feels crazier than usual.
Nobody wants to be bombarded with life’s hardships all the time. Solitude helps bring peace back into the personal life. Sometimes a break is much needed especially with no distractions or external factors to cloud the mind.
5. If It’s Too Good to Be True, It Probably Is
This is one of the most important valuable lessons that I learned many years ago, but it’s too good to keep off this list. There are frauds and scams all over the world, especially since the internet has taken off at the beginning of this century.
Although this lesson is often tied to money, it can be applied to other aspects of life as well. For example, if a friend only hits you up for their benefit, then they probably aren’t a friend in the first place. Anything that seems too good to be true should be approached with caution before finally deciding if it’s legitimate or genuine.
6. Moderation is Key
Moderation is key to virtually everything in life. Obviously anything that could be detrimental to overall health should be limited- drugs/alcohol, social media, etc. However, even “good” things should be consumed in moderation as well. Too much of anything doesn’t help in the long run.
Living a life of moderation comes with times that break the moderation. Humans aren’t mean to be robotic. Sometimes we drink too much and feel it the next day. Sometimes we spend too much time scrolling on social media. Humans aren’t meant to be perfect. Even moderation requires moderation.
7. Never Expect Anything in Return
Doing a good deed shouldn’t come with an expectation of receiving something in return. Just because you gave a homeless guy $5 doesn’t mean something good will immediately come your way.
Good deeds lose value when they are done with the hope of getting something in return. When you do something beneficial to someone else, it should be left at that. Someone might or might not do something to your benefit that same day or shortly after. However, that thought shouldn’t cross the mind when doing something beneficial for someone else. Karma is real, but shouldn’t be on our minds 24/7.
8. Friends Change Constantly
Friends come and go like the seasons around us. Sometimes there is a falling out while others have two people grow apart. Just because someone isn’t your friend anymore doesn’t mean they hate you or you should hate them. Relationships of any kind don’t last forever. Friendships should be cherished for what they are presently.
Every friend comes into our lives for a reason. Sometimes we may never know that exact reason. However, friends make life better. A good friend brings joy and happiness. A great friend is irreplaceable and can never be replicated. Never take friends for granted; they all serve a purpose in our lives.
9. Watch What You Consume
Obviously you should watch what you eat and drink, but it doesn’t stop there. The shows you watch, the music you listen to, and the social media posts you look at all have an impact on your mind. Even if something is consumed as part of “rest,” it can still have a detrimental effect.
Limiting negative and ignorant comments, posts, and media as a whole has helped me stay grounded. Although it is inevitable that someone will be rude or disrespectful online, it’s essential to limit consumption of negative content of any form as much as possible.
10. Always Remain Humble
Life can be very humbling at times. We come across situations that make us feel bad about ourselves. However, these times don’t last forever. No matter how good life gets, it’s important to always remain humble. Things can change dramatically and even overnight.
There are too many stories of people literally losing everything they have. Staying humble keeps us grounded; never too high and never too low. No peak is tall enough to look past the valleys.
11. Nobody Ever Has Everything Figured Out
No matter how well someone appears to be living, they still have insecurities, confusing or frustrating relationships, and secrets that nobody knows about. Nobody ever has everything figured out. Even the most successful people in the world are still figuring things out one day at a time.
Life isn’t meant to be perfect. It can’t be planned out to perfection. It’s okay to not have everything figured out. Life goes on. Nothing will ever be fully “figured out.”
12. Rest is Essential
This may an obvious one to most, but some don’t realize how important rest is during any type of journey. Sure, someone can work nonstop. However, the quality of work will decrease drastically without rest and they will end up working harder and longer than they should have.
Nobody can work 24/7. Hustle culture can be toxic and portrays false images to the masses. Rest is necessary for any type of journey requiring time, energy, and effort. Rest is essential for many reasons. The most important reason is that humans need rest to be the best version of themselves.
13. Your Work Doesn’t Define You
Even if you love your job and/or the work you do, there is much more to define you as a person. One thing I hate about American culture is how much work is forced onto people. When Americans first meet, one of the first questions typically asked is what do you do?
People rarely answer the question by talking about their interests and hobbies outside of work. Being a lawyer or a doctor doesn’t define someone. A person has much more to tell their story than only through their occupation. One of the most important valuable lessons on this list is that work shouldn’t define who you are no matter how successful someone becomes or how much they like their work.
14. Nobody likes Negativity (Except Negative People)
The world can seem negative enough on a regular basis. The news constantly shows negative news stories everyday. With enough negativity to last a lifetime, most people don’t want to hear or see any more negativity in their lives. Everyone has their own issues. It’s okay to be down as emotions are natural.
Negativity loves company. The negativity you put out into the world will only multiply. Exude positivity or at least stay neutral when the world around you seems nothing but negative.
15. Positivity Can Be Toxic
Now, this one may seem contradictory given the last lesson. However, it’s impossible to be positive 24/7/365. When positivity is forced upon others, it can become toxic. Positivity should come from conscious effort, not through force or power. Bad things are inevitable in life. Nobody should have to be positive all the time.
It’s natural to feel negative from time to time. Negativity and positivity are two states in life. One isn’t better than the other. Without one, the other cannot exist. Positivity is usually a good thing, but can be toxic when it gets forced onto people.
16. Nobody Can Do the Work For You
This one should be obvious, but it’s still important nonetheless.
Nobody can make it happen except you. Some people may help or set you up for success, but they can’t do the work for you. Even people who cheat their way in life learn this lesson. Nobody who cares for you will do the work for you. The only way to be successful and improve in life is by doing the work for yourself.
17. Success Requires Risk
Any sort of success requires some type of risk. Even if that risk is minimal and the consequences aren’t severe, it’s still a gamble that could go either way.
Nobody achieves success by playing it safe nonstop. Taking a calculated risk and taking a mindless risk are two completely different things. Success requires gambles from time to time. The most successful individuals don’t achieve their goals by sitting around waiting for opportunities to come their way.
18. Forgiving Is Necessary
Sometimes you have to forgive people who don’t deserve your forgiveness in the first place. Forgiving isn’t always for the person or people who committed the wrongdoing. Forgiveness often does more for your inner peace than it does for the other party.
Forgiving is necessary because it becomes easier to let go of hate and resentment. It isn’t healthy to hold onto hateful thoughts all the time. Sometimes you have to forgive others for your sake.
19. Sometimes You Have to Be Selfish
Now this isn’t about being selfish on a constant basis. Sometimes you have to choose yourself and be selfish to get what you want in life. If you go through life being unselfish all the time, you will get taken advantage of and fooled on multiple occasions. Valuable lessons like this one are often hard to learn especially for people who don’t want to be viewed as selfish.
Selfish acts don’t make someone selfish instantly. Selfish acts on a repeated basis with no regard for others makes someone selfish. Choosing to spend time on your own rather than going out with friends may be selfish, but is necessary at times. You have to do what’s best for yourself and sometimes that requires uncomfortable, selfish acts.
20. Remember Why You Started
Starting any type of worthwhile journey will inevitably come with obstacles and hardships. Remembering why you started in the first place helps you power through when you feel like giving up.
It may sound cliche, but having a strong “why” is more important that the “who,” or “what.” Keep your reason for starting in mind to stay balanced and remain grounded especially during times of struggle.
21. Learning Doesn’t Stop When School Ends
After high school and college for some, most people stop their formal education. Valuable lessons are all around when the mind is open to learning new things. Just because school ends, doesn’t mean learning has to come to a screeching halt as well. The world today provides countless outlets to learn everyday; there’s no excuse to stop learning when one is done with school.
People who don’t read are missing out on an essential way to learn and expand the mind. Reading is fundamental because it is one of the easiest and most accessible ways to learn in today’s age. Free books are readily available in libraries all over the world. Those individuals who stop learning when school comes to an end will find their mental states declining rapidly.
22. Your Time Will Come
If everyone achieved everything they wanted exactly when they wanted to, then life would be pretty boring and even meaningless. The journey is better than the destination. People who grow up with a silver spoon in their mouth often have a hard time adjusting to the real world because they live in a clouded environment. Everything won’t go your way all the time; the process of reaching a goal teaches more than achieving the goal itself ever will.
Your time will come. Patience is essential especially when you start feeling impatient. Those that keep their head down and stay determined will get what they want out of life.
23. Your Best Will Look Different Everyday
As humans, it’s natural to have ups and downs on this journey called life. Nobody is perfect, no matter how hard they try to be. Someone’s best may be 85% of their full potential today and only 50% tomorrow.
Countless factors play into what someone’s best looks like. Anyone can improve, but it’s impossible to keep robotic levels of production everyday.
24. Everyday is a Blessing
Everyday alive is a blessing. Sometimes we get so caught up in routines that we take daily privileges and blessing for granted. Even bad or down days can still be appreciated. One of the most valuable lessons in life is realizing the fact that time is the most valuable currency in the world as it can never be replaced.
Some people wish they could live a different life or make more money or become famous. However, nothing can be achieved if daily happenings are taken for granted. Everyday is a blessing because life is too short to take any moment for granted.
25. Happiness Comes from Within
One of the most valuable lessons I have learned in my twenty five years of life is the fact that happiness comes internally. Nothing can buy long-lasting happiness. Nobody can make you happy. Nowhere can give you the happiness you have been looking for.
You are the only person in the world who can bring yourself happiness. Being happy is a choice that nobody else can make except yourself.