Choosing Yourself: Balancing Being Selfish and Unselfish

Relationships are complicated. People are complex. Life is confusing. Being selfish and unselfish don’t go together, but they do affect each other in countless ways.

Sometimes you have to choose yourself. However, finding the balance between being selfish and unselfish can be extremely challenging.

Finding Time for Yourself

Sometimes life requires you to actively find time for yourself. Between work, school, and time with friends/family/significant others, it may seem like we really don’t have much time to take a step back. Life won’t stop and wait around for you to find time for yourself.

Everyday holds new opportunities. People may choose to spend time with others for the majority of the day while others would rather spend time alone and enjoy some solitude. Finding a balance between being selfish and unselfish only gets more complicated as we age.

As we get older, priorities and responsibilities change. At the same time, it may be challenging to find time to appreciate yourself and enjoy solitude.

Life won’t wait for anyone. Finding time for yourself is all about having your priorities straight and handling your responsibilities. Creating that time without handling what needs to be done is immature and selfish. Unselfish behavior is appreciated in some cultures more than others. However, there’s a time and place to be selfish for personal reasons. Sometimes you can’t rely on others or need time to learn more about yourself.

Being Selfish and Unselfish

Although being selfish and unselfish are opposites, the two complement each other when balanced reasonably and efficiently.

Nobody that lives amongst other individuals can be selfish or unselfish 24/7/365. People who live in uninhabited areas cannot be unselfish if others aren’t around at all. On the other hand, humans who live in a community, no matter the size, cannot be selfish all the time.

People tend to move out of highly populated areas in an attempt to find more balance in their personal lives. No matter where one lives, as long as other humans are around, the dilemma of being selfish and unselfish will never end.

Anyone can say they are unselfish, but few actually prove so. Unselfish behavior comes from actions, nothing else. American society is often selfish overall and encourages selfish behavior; it takes conscious thoughts and actions to become an unselfish person. All unselfish people act selfishly from time to time.

Choosing Yourself in a Selfish World

Often, unselfish individuals may feel guilty for choosing what’s best for them. There’s a major difference between choosing what’s best for yourself and acting selfishly. Selfish behavior tends to harm or leave out others; choosing oneself stems from selfish acts for the greater good of oneself.

Although the world around us is usually selfish, we don’t have to join the selfish humans we constantly hear about and see routinely. Selfish people have no remorse and little to no regard for others. They rarely think about how their actions will affect others. Whether someone accepts it or not, their actions affect other people besides themselves. Some may benefit others while some directly or indirectly harm others. Unselfish people choose themselves because they know it’s impossible to remain unselfish all the time.

At the end of the day, if you don’t choose yourself, someone will take advantage of you one way or another. Countless people in this world are looking for the next person to get a one up on and benefit themselves with little regard for how their actions affect others. You have to find that balance between being selfish and unselfish. Choosing yourself may be selfish sometimes, but it doesn’t necessarily make you a selfish person.