Does anybody ever have life figured out? How do people act like they have everything figured out when they clearly don’t? It’s okay to still be figuring out life no matter how young or old you are.
One of the most humbling facts of life is that everyone doesn’t really know what the hell they are doing on Earth. Some may find purpose in life or have some things figured out, but nobody ever has everything figured out. The journey of life is all about figuring out life along the way and appreciating the worthwhile experiences and people who come into our lives.
Figuring Out Complex Relationships
Humans are complex beings, so why do we expect our interactions and experiences with one another to be simple?
The human brain is too powerful to allow its body to live simply. Emotions, feelings, and thoughts all add to the complexities of daily life. When you add in other people, things are bound to get complicated and messy.
Even relationship experts don’t have perfect relationships. Why should we beat ourselves up over a failed friendship or romantic relationship?
We are learning along the way; so is everyone we meet in life. People unintentionally hurt others. Sometimes we hurt people without even realizing until a later time in our lives.
Everyone comes into our life for a reason. Their duration of making an impact on our lives is undetermined. Most don’t stick around for very long at all. Some stay around for seasons. Others, who mean the most, are around for generations.
Instead of looking at failed friendships and relationships, we can view them as lessons that had to occur. The hate towards that ex will get you nowhere in life. Neither will that grudge with your ex-best friend. Forgive yourself and move on. New people are coming into your life, usually when you least expect it. Appreciate the genuine ones in your life, but always be prepared to meet more people no matter the current circumstances.
Friends, Family, and a Sense of Belonging
As social beings, humans aren’t meant to be socially isolated. While some people thrive in the presence of others and high levels of stimulations, others prefer less stimulation and are often more comfortable on their own.
Figuring out life is all about figuring out who we are as a person and to find some sort of sense of belonging in this world. Friends and family can help figure things out, but they cannot do any of the uncomfortable work for us.
Some friends are part of family. At the same time, some family members are distant strangers who have little to no immediate impact on our lives. Blood never has and never will make someone family. If someone says, “but they are family,” they are often part of the problem at hand. Family doesn’t intentionally hurt the people they care about.
Friends can either bring us a lot of satisfaction and fulfillment in life or leave us scratching our heads asking who is really a friend and who is jumping along for a short ride?
People who fade away from each other easily probably didn’t have a strong friendship in the first place. Many people associate with others who have similar interests and hobbies. However, the best of friends often have many differences but still put them aside and hold each other accountable.
“Yes men” bring their “friends” down in the long run. Everybody wants to hear exactly what they want; very few are okay with having friends who call them out for their wrongs and hold them accountable.
A sense of belonging will never come from another person. We have to find the balance between being with others and enjoying our own company. The people who are around today might not be around in a few years or a decade from now.
Figuring Out Life: Work and Sense of Purpose
In American culture, countless identities are tied to work and what is directly produced. People have lives outside of work, but often introduce themselves to others by first stating what they do for work. Nobody would have much of a personality if they didn’t have interests, hobbies, and passion outside of work.
A job will never define someone’s purpose in life. However, many Americans tie their work to their identity and are left clueless when they leave their current or “dream” job.
Figuring out one’s sense of purpose is one of the hardest parts of “figuring out life.”
Work can have a positive or negative connotation depending on how an individual views the subject. Work can be meaningful and fulfilling, but it should never consume someone and be their life. Instead, it is a part of life that can easily change with the blink of an eye.
Sense of purpose relates to what a person can do for the world and how they do it, not what they produce as a result of their work.
Enjoy the Journey
At the end of the day, nobody truly has everything all figured out. You probably won’t have it all figured out in a decade or two from now. Even when life comes to an end, most people would agree they never had everything all together.
Figuring out life is about enjoying the journey that comes with the countless ups and downs. Waiting for the perfect situation will leave you waiting your whole life. Start doing what you want to now and don’t look back.
Life will get figured out along the way. Live in the moment and live without regret.
