Making and keeping friends is often one of the hardest things to do in life especially for introverts. Some people may get the wrong impression of us while others may rub us the wrong way. At the end of the day, friendships are complicated and complex, just like any other type of relationship in life.
Friends, Acquaintances, and Everything in Between
The term ‘friend’ is often used more loosely in youth compared to adulthood. As people grow older, they often realize more friends doesn’t always lead to better experiences and feelings. Acquaintances rarely exist in childhood but are found everywhere as maturity comes around. Friendships dwindle with time for known and unknown reasons; most friendships come and go like the seasons roll around every year like clockwork.
Acquaintances often fill adult lives because as we age our priorities change. We may know more people than ever before, but don’t have as many people to call a true friend. Differentiating between an acquaintance and a friend is half the battle. The other half is figuring out how these humans fit in our lives in a positive and healthy manner.
Significant life events either draw us closer to friends or create a larger gap in the friendship. When someone moves, they either become better friends due to staying in touch more frequently or more often than not, fade away from each other due to the literal and figurative distance. Another example is when individuals get in serious romantic relationships with a particular significant other. Some friends become more distant as their partner takes up more of their time and energy. At the same time, some friends become closer. Only time will tell how such events will impact friendships and acquaintances. Friendships are complicated.
Friendships: Not a Numbers Game
Acquiring more friends typically doesn’t directly lead to better experiences and an increase in overall happiness. Friendships are complicated and shouldn’t be valued based off numbers alone. Quality of relationships in life is far more important than the total quantity. Someone with one hundred friends may feel lonely while another person with only ten true friends feels appreciated and respected. Numbers never have and never will determine the impact of friendships in life.
Friends are supposed to be an addition to a collection like sports trading cards or sneakers. Real friends should be cherished and appreciated more like family heirlooms; they cannot be bought, replicated, or replaced. One friend may leave your life and a new one enters. However, no two friends are exactly alike and cannot serve the same exact purpose in our lives.
Friendships are complicated and should never be viewed as a numbers game. Those who seek to acquire more friends solely for quantity sake will typically find themselves in a more negative situation than initially expected.
Friendships Are Complicated: Different Types of Friends
All friends aren’t created equal. Some may be genuine while others may stick around only for their benefit. Some friends don’t require much effort and others need more attention and energy for various reasons.
Figuring out where your friends and acquaintances fit in your life is half the battle. You feel horrible when you realize someone doesn’t like you or appreciate you as you initially thought. While they may still be a friend or acquaintance, these individuals must have a defined role in your life. Some “friends” will take advantage of you if you give them an inch; others speak highly of you and defend your name behind your back when you’re not present. All friends and acquaintances aren’t equal.
There may be drinking (or smoking) buddies, friends you play sports with, work friends, people who you bond together over a similar hobby, or neighbors who become friendly acquaintances or even turn into true friends. There are countless different types of friends and acquaintances for every occasion possible. Friendships are complicated and it’s often even more complicated to put a label on every single friendship you’ve had in the past, have now in the present, or will have in the future.
Navigating Friendships Throughout Life
Like any relationship, friendships are rarely easy or simple. Any relationship between two functioning humans is bound to be complex and complicated. Friendships of all types require time, energy and effort to flourish.
Trust is built over time but can be destroyed in a matter of seconds. Watch who you call a friend and never take real friends for granted in this short life.
Life will bring along numerous friendships, some may be more beneficial or rewarding than others, but they all teach valuable lessons and impact our life in various ways.